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"I've got a PYTHON in my pants!"

Man Filmed Stuffing Python Down His Pants In Brazen Pet Shop Theft
There was a snake in his pants, but no one was happy to see him.
A ballsy shoplifter stuffed a two-foot python down his pants during a pet store theft caught on video, the Oregon store's outraged owner said.
"He's lucky it wasn't feeding day," Christin Bjugan, who owns Portland's A to Z pet store, where Friday's crime was committed, told KPTV. "Feeding days are on Mondays. And they're very hungry."

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